Great Mum V Shit Mum…

Room for another small one??

Here it is, my first ever blog post. Hope you enjoy reading!

When I’m a great mum I bake mouse cupcakes with my children.

10 reasons I think I’m a great mum…

  1. Behaviour and discipline.
  2. I keep a beautiful and tidy home (please excuse the vile 1940’s housewife lingo).
  3. Cooking healthy, home cooked meals from scratch every night (not that they always get eaten).
  4. LOVE – I love those little sh*ts so much it’s overwhelming. A friend once asked me what it felt like to have kids and I could only describe it as “Like the love you felt for your favourite ever pet mixed with the all consuming love you felt for your very first love, times a million”.
  5. I shower them with positive praise, compliments, hugs and kisses all the time.
  6. Lots of arts and crafts! Hobbycraft be my church! Praise be to the HC loyalty card! AMEN!!
  7. I selflessly ferry them round to lots of parties, clubs, activities and fun days out.
  8. They’re always well turned out. I mean I never buy any clothes for myself these days but they always look the shizzle.
  9. I’m pretty well organised… most of the time.
  10. I’m a fun mum (except when I’m hungry or tired or suffering from PMT… which is quite often…hmm?) who loves to play, dance and be silly.
When I’m a sh*t mum I go on hen dos and pretend like I don’t have kids for three days.

10 reasons I think I’m a sh*t mum…

  1. I sometimes get so bored I want to stick my head in the oven and scream.
  2. I’m not always a good listener. My brain is so busy I do tend to be thinking of something else… a lot.
  3. PMT… worst mother ever for about 4 days every month. I go from being a patient, calm, nice mum to a shouty, grumpy, horrible one who just wants to PUNCH THEM ALL IN THE FACE!!!!!!!
  4. Hangovers. Ok so they don’t happen that often, however, I have been know to not be able to do the school run because I’ve been too hung over. ***hangs head in utter shame***
  5. I’m usually quite organised but when I do f*ck up it is usually monumental. Turning up to school on staff training days is usually the curve ball that hits me right in the fanny.
  6. Too much Netflix… yup the screen nanny has been known to hold the fort for a good few hours. Just love the way it keeps on playing.
  7. I HATE soft play and kids parties and especially kid’s parties at soft play… AAAARGH!!
  8. I can be selfish.
  9. I can be forgetful which does cause sh*t mum scenarios, can’t remember what they are right now? ***cymbal crash***
  10. I sometimes get them to bed too late but by this time I’m usually running on empty. When I’m weak and bedraggled those little d*ck heads can run rings around me to the point I feel like booking a one way ticket to a yoga retreat in Goa…not that I’ve Googled it or anything.

So what about you guys? What makes you a great or a sh*t mum?

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